A nobody is arrested on suspicion of a suspended driver’s license? Really? That’s what qualifies for news these days?

But it’s more than that. Parkour or “Freerunning”, is becoming a popular urban sport. The best compete in the World Freerun Championship event, this year in London. This is the 2nd annual event and 27 freerunners representing 17 countries will traverse through a specifically designed course, showcasing their personal style.

Here’s what it looks like when it’s done right:

And when done by noobs, it looks like this:

I will be participating in the ESPN Zone Sports Spelling Bee on Thursday, May 28 at the ESPN Zone here in Chicago. And I will be gunning for more than $1,000 in prizes, but I mostly hope to win food. The action begins at 6:30.

50 contestants will try to spell the names of local and national sports figures, coinciding with the 82nd Annual Scripps National Spelling Bee in DC. I consider myself to be the favorite, because I once placed 3rd in a “Word of the Day” competition in 4th grade. And I think everyone else may be drunk.

If you want to take me on in the competition, just email SportsSpellingBee@espnzone.com and include your name, address, phone number, birth year and tag it with ESPN Zone Chicago. Or you can also register in-person by visiting the retail store at the ESPN Zone.

On to more important matters…What kind of PEDs should I take?

And it wasn’t just a “sure we’ll have a chat with him” deal. There was more.

“Several NBA sources confirmed the February meeting between the former president and general manager of the New York Knicks, adding that there were follow-up discussions between Thomas and other high-ranking club officials — but also stressing that no job has been offered.”

The Clippers. Isiah. Awesome. If they hurry and get a deal done, I know Isiah can go get Jamal Crawford!

Talking about his dismal bowling skills, Obama said he’d been practicing and had gotten his score up to 129. “Oh, no, that’s very good,” Leno told Obama.

“It was like the Special Olympics or something,” Obama joked, drawing laughter from the funnyman and his audience.

“The President made an offhand remark making fun of his own bowling that was in no way intended to disparage the Special Olympics,” Obama spokesman Bill Burton told reporters on Air Force One after the taping.”

No, he just meant to compare his bowling to that of a retard. Oh, hahahaha. Not funny. And then Leno laughs at that? What a wuss. Bring on Conan. Long live Letterman!

Lidle’s widow, Melanie, is suing Cirrus Design Corp., the manufacturer of the plane that her husband was in when he crashed and died on October 11, 2006. She’s asking for more than $50 million, and the New York Post reports that his agent is claiming that Lidle would have made $45 million in salary from playing and coaching baseball.

Jordan Feagan may have a bit of an inflated sense of his own abilities as an agent. Lidle would have been 35 years old before the 2007 season, had never made more than $3.3 million in a season and was as average a pitcher as you could find in the major leagues.

The Lidle’s are also being sued by people from the building that was hit by the plane Lidle was flying. So perhaps there is a need for money. But wouldn’t insurance cover those suits? If they could prove the plane manufacturer was at fault those suits would then go away. The NTSB, however, ruled that pilot error was the cause of the crash. Just a sad story.

“Valenti read two comments from listeners about college basketball and one about baseball, then a joke about a capsized boat in Lake St. Clair. The hosts laughed, and crumpling paper could be heard.

On the air, he said: “I just offer you my sincerest apologies. It was completely ridiculous to put it on the air, and again, it comes to me. The only thing I can promise you as my listeners, it won’t happen again. Otherwise, I’ll tell you right now, I don’t deserve to be around.” Debbie Kenyon, the station’s market manager, said: “We fully agree that the comment was absolutely inappropriate.”

As suspected, people are up in arms and some are calling for Valenti to be fired.

“Asked if Valenti would face further discipline, Kenyon said: “I think I’ve said enough. We’ve addressed the issue with Mike the way we feel is best. The on-air apology is pretty big. We don’t do that very often.”

Also not done often on radio: making fun of people lost at sea, 3 of whom are now presumed to be dead. Say that you are handling it internally or something else–but that an on-air apology is big? Weak.

Eller was convicted of 4th-degree assault of a police officer and 2nd-degree refusal to submit to chemical testing, both gross misdemeanors. From the story:

(Judge) Mabley found that Eller had been drinking at a Minneapolis bar before he drove through a stop sign and swerved toward a squad car, just missing it, on April 9. Officers followed Eller, but he did not stop until he pulled into his driveway.

Mabley found that once Eller stepped out of his vehicle, he did not obey commands to show his hands and he resisted arrest. He fought with the two officers, and was not subdued until backup officers arrived.

Is that really a ‘stern sentence’? What exactly should one receive for failing to pull over, disobeying officers’ commands, resisting arrest, driving drunk and physically fighting with the police? He’s not even going to a real jail. He’s going to a workhouse.

Just so I am clear, I could: Drive drunk, not pull over when the sirens light up, fight with the police, disobey them and resist arrest and all I would have to do is go work for 60 days and stay home for 60 days?

The sentence doesn’t seem stern enough.

[tags]Carl Eller, NFL[/tags]